I have read a string of really good books over the past four months, all having that special beckoning quality that makes you look forward to finding the time to sit down and read.  There’s nothing better than that.  So I thought I’d share these recommendations, in case you’re looking for that next great book.

The Red Tent, by Anita Diamant.  This book has been out for years, but I just got around to reading it.  It’s a wonderful story about the Story of Dinah, daughter of Jacob and sister of Joseph.  The story is about the tribe of Jacob and the bonds of womenhood and the importance of the Red Tent – the womanly place where rites of passage are celebrated.

The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society by Mary Ann Schaffer and Annie Barrows.  A wonderful book whose stories unfold through a series of letters written during WWII and the German occupation of Guernsey.

The Help by Kathryn Stockett.  A debut novel, the author weave a story set in Mississippi about the relationship between white women and the black women who take care of their home and raise their children.  This book is insightful and riveting.

The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafon.  Set in Barcelona, this story is about a young man on a quest to find other books by an author he has discovered – and finds all books have been destroyed.  While it seems like an unassuming and maybe even mundane plot line, the story is rich with wonderful writing, character development and true intrigue.

Today I opened the pages of  The Tender Bar by J.R. Moehringer, a memoir about a fatherless boy growing up in Manhasset, New York and the huge presence the patrons of a local bar have on his life.  I will write more about this one once I finish, but it’s the type of book you pick up and are pulled in to from the start.

Please share any good books you’ve read lately, or even some of your all time favorites!

When it comes to food storage, I’m a tosser. I’m vigilant about ferreting out food items that are past their prime, and I only save leftovers that are likely to be eaten. Thus, the space-hogging cups of blue jello that Caitlin made last week that remain untouched in our fridge – GONE in my clean sweep from last night!

I believe this is an inherited trait from my maternal side. As I think back to forays inside my mother’s fridge and my mother’s mother’s fridge, I recall easy navigation among the relatively few, but always good, foodstuffs.

In Peek Inside Elaine’s Fridge, a post from nearly two years ago (!), I chronicled the contents of my fridge and noted some differences between tossers and keepers (those folks who have overflowing refrigerators and throw out items only duress).

I was reminded of these musings when I recently read about a new gadget that could help with my vigilance: a digital day counter that attaches to food and monitors the number of days it resides in the recesses of your refrigerator or freezers.

My inner tosser is delighted!

At $4 a timer, I won’t go crazy, but I am ordering a few of these today. Other uses for the gadget? On plants (”Hmmm, when did I last water that  plant?”), furnace filters, bottles of wine, Toby’s heart worm pill, just to name a few.

The icing on the cake (still fresh, of course)? The DaysAgo counter was “born” when two Wise Women had a Eureka moment. The new moms were taking a break from their brainstorming session about business ventures to feed their babies and couldn’t remember which of the many jars of opened baby foods were still OK to use. Talk about necessity being the mother of invention (and good timing!)

Don’t you just love new gadgets? It reminds me of the excitement generated when there’s a cool, new app for a phone or handheld device. Of course, I don’t know how to use most apps, so I’ll just be enthused about the brilliantly simple DaysAgo counter.

What gadgets do other Wise Women use?

A dear friend who has two sons adopted from Korea forwarded a video starring ten moms (including herself) who have adopted children.  The lead-in line to the video is – “When a child is adopted, a mother is born.”

It’s very heartwarming and I thought it was worth sharing, especially with so many children around the world in need of a family.

For the short clip on you tube, click here.

To see the full five minute video, click here.

If adoption is something that you have been considering, I think this just may inspire you to take the next step.

On a beautiful drive up and back to Vermont over the Thanksgiving holiday, I listened to an interview on the radio (happened to catch the same interview both ways) with a gentleman named Barton Brooks. Barton, once a Manhattan Real Estate Broker, tossed that life aside four years ago and started Global Colors.  Global Colors’ mission is “to aid in the development of grassroots campaigns using local ingenuity and resources to accomplish very specific goals”.

I decided to do a little investigation of Global Colors when I arrived home.  An hour and half later – after digging into his site and the global projects that he has undertaken – I must say I’m impressed.  Part of the appeal is his simple call to action – just go and do. Visit a part of the world you’re interested in, and ask how you can help.  Involve the locals in the solution – so they too learn how to empower themselves.  It can even be as simple as inquiring at the concierge’s desk at the hotel you’re staying at during vacation to learn if there is an orphanage near by that you can visit for a few hours during your vacation.

His website is filled with stories – and about the projects he’s currently working on and trying to raise awareness to direct aid efforts.  One that struck a chord with me was the Batwa Pygmies in Uganda – a group of people that have been displaced from their ancestral lands – a group of people who aren’t even recognized as humans because of their small stature.  They live on a small bit of land, but can’t afford the seeds to even farm the land.  They subsist on a small portion of porridge daily.

When Barton asked the villagers how he could help, their response was help to raise money to provide a chicken for each of the children – as a chicken will lay an egg a day to give each child the protein they need, as well as give them an animal to care for and love.  Barton’s efforts have turned into a much larger effort – helping the villagers build huts, chicken coops, plant gardens.  I must admit that this project had particular appeal to me – the ability to raise $9 per chicken to provide a child with food is a tangible goal that my son and his friends that are interested in agriculture could embrace.

Another inspiring story is the women of  Nairobi, Kenya – who have been making beads for years – at the Kazuri Bead factory.  (The creation of this factory is one for another blog). Their beads are beautiful – (and are for sale – check out Kazuriwest.com) but the inspiring piece of this story is that these women sometimes provide for up to 20 extended family members, and the company itself is a model of commerce – providing healthcare, childcare, paying three times the customary annual wage for these women that work at the factory.

Barton’s latest project is called 52 weeks to Change the World, and he has mapped out a course to take him to several destinations across the world to implement his notion of “guerrilla aid” – helping with whatever the local need is.  He has a blog where he is reporting on his travels and identifying how people can help.  I have signed up to receive his reports – so will keep you apprised of any interesting stories.  Barton Brooks has created a very inspiring life mission indeed.

I’m sure most of you have seen Maria Shriver over the past month on the news programs speaking about her recently released report regarding A Women’s Nation that Changes Everything.  I found that I was just catching a bit of her interviews – and was interested in learning more.  Ms. Shriver, along with the  Center for American Progress, have just released The Shriver Report – a report about the status of today’s woman.  A report of this depth and magnitude has not been conducted in nearly 50 years – when John F. Kennedy asked Eleanor Roosevelt to chair the first Commission on the Status of the American Woman.

The results are not surprising.  Half of all US workers are women, and women are the primary breadwinner or the co-breadwinner in nearly two-thirds of American families. Furthermore, four in five families with children at home do not comprise the traditional model of Dad being the breadwinner and Mom being the homemaker.  The study points out that the managing of daily life (work and personal) rather than being the traditional model of battle of the sexes – is transforming in to a negotiation between the sexes as it relates to work, family, household responsibility, childcare and elder-care.

The common concern, of course, is that kids may be left behind.  In families where both parents work, sometimes it’s a necessity, sometimes it’s a choice.  Regardless, today’s parents are spending a lot less time with their children.  The challenge becomes that our workplaces, the government, and our religious institutions haven’t quite figured out how to embrace this reality.  Flexible work schedules, comprehensive childcare policies, redesigned family and medical leave and equal pay – are still non-existent or in the infancy stages at most places.

Somehow I’ve managed to work three days a week since my oldest was born 15 years ago.  Now I work as a consultant – but I worked as a part time employee for two different companies for ten years.  This balancing act is not only something for parents to figure out, but also the workplace.  And while I wish corporations were more advanced in figuring out how to better manage flexibility – I also understand it is a huge challenge. By publishing this report, Maria Shriver is at least trying to promote this topic as part of a national agenda and force a serious conversation about this topic. Rather than continuing to dismiss, ignore, or table for a better time, hopefully corporate America will put some heavy lifters focused on this agenda to develop a solution that is both a win/win for employees as well as the corporation.

To read this report in its entirety or just excerpts, click on the link above.  If anyone has personal stories to share as it relates to this topic and the realities of balancing, please reach out to myself or Elaine.  Guest bloggers welcome!

UK stroller maker Maclaren has led the headlines this week due to a safety concern for their umbrella strollers. The headlines were astonishing, as it mentioned 12 children’s finger tips had been amputated and a million strollers being affected by a U.S. Consumer Safety Commission recall. 

Mainstream media has represented a rather one sided story – and has not reported the fact that the potential for injury occurs during the opening and folding of the stroller when the child should not be near it.  It probably goes without saying that any stroller (as well as many other hinged products) can present the same risks to a toddler if their fingers are clutching the hinge area when the parent is trying to fold it up.

As I have worked for a consumer products company for twenty years, I understand that it is the utmost responsibility of corporate America to offer safe and reliable products.  I can still think back to the Pepsi syringe PR nightmare, which ultimately was found out to have been orchestrated by a consumer – not a manufacturing line mishap. Regardless, Pepsi took swift action to act responsibly, and take responsibility.

I have used a Maclaren stroller for all four of my children. They are the sturdiest most durable stroller on the planet.  To me this becomes a question of personal responsibility vs. corporate responsibility. Maclaren has taken the right approach to stand up and initiate and orchestrate a very costly recall. But let’s not forget, there are many innocent dangers lurking in our household – and while we trust that the products we buy are safe beyond reproach, we also have to exercise our own good judgement to keep our kids safe.

Next Tuesday, November 3rd, HBO premieres a movie called By the People: The Election of Barack Obama. Produced by noted actor Ed Norton, the film makers Amy Rice and Alicia Sams started filming the documentary in 2007 a full year before Barack Obama announced his candidacy for President.  The filmmakers were inspired by his oratory skills and charismatic nature witnessed by the nation when he first came on the national scene during the 2004 Democratic Convention.  It didn’t start out about the making of a President, but just a charismatic Freshman Senator from Illinois.  These filmmakers had unprecedented access to Obama and his family over a two year period – filming the triumphs, the disappointments, challenges and controversies.

What is also fascinating is the inside look at his campaign team, and the way they were able to galvanize the support of millions and turn supporters into new political activists.   Ed Norton states: “I think people will look back on this campaign as one that was conducted with a real understanding of communication and organizing tools that were singular to that moment. It was an historic new read on how you could do an end run around conventional political methodology and strategies.”

From what I’ve read and heard, it looks like a very compelling viewing opportunity.  There’s just one problem:  I don’t have HBO.  Maybe it’s time to give in.  I know that would make the kids happy!

Guest Blogger Adriana shares her thoughts and feelings regarding the emotions that mark the early stages of menopause.  Some of us have yet to experience this, while others I’m sure have made the journey through.  Anyone who has thoughts on this topic, questions, or revelations, please share!

I do not choose to avert my premenopausal symptoms.

Having said that, let me clarify that I am not overjoyed to periodically experience the effects.  Typically, they are not pleasant.  I am left irritable at times, short of patience, exasperated, angry and …  (ahem), seething has surfaced a time or two.   My sleep is often disrupted, leaving my mental acuity in question and my level of enthusiasm for the couch at a new high.  Clearly, to those around me, I am not my usual self.  I, perhaps, have often been the one left the most surprised ( ok, astounded) at some of my responses to friends, co- workers and family members.  The most amazing development is that , when in this state, I have little control over my reactions. They are from the heart and expressed in truth.  Development, indeed.

I did some research and found that, in my upper forties,  I am right on schedule.  The world is unfolding as it should.  I learned a bit about the science of things, the emotions, the physical and spiritual effects.  I got some answers to questions I had wondered about myself, the person I seem to be becoming. I found out that becoming is the operative word.  I gained a sense that this change is purposeful, and would lead to an eventual promise of transformation.  My typical optimistic approach to life leads me to believe my greatest sense of self and my deepest wisdom awaits.

For me, I think it is something for which I need to participate. For now I can afford to do so.  Thankfully, my responses are not such that I am hurting my children or I am in jeopardy of losing my job.  Besides, I am more than a bit curious about the metamorphosis.   Perhaps the reason I seek time alone more often now, is to contemplate all that is going on and to do some much needed work on myself.  Even the restless sleep patterns give way to purpose as I have additional time, while not welcomed, to progress.

I am approaching perimenopause much like I approached labor for each of my three children.  I am willing to try the experience unmedicated and see how it goes.  I will reserve judgment until the experience and the space I am in prompts me to choose otherwise.  My first two deliveries were unmedicated.  For my third baby, an epidural was the best course of action.

I might grow frustrated with the time it takes to evolve.  Leaving behind the social graces  of the public façade, to speak truth to others and to myself, is a change that takes time.  I often think of a poignant time when my eldest son was a little boy.  He found a caterpillar on a milkweed stem.  We put it in a box and watched it form a cocoon. In a few short days a butterfly emerged much to his delight.  He watched it continuously and even “helped” it come out of her cocoon, unraveling the edges to allow her to release.  Unfortunately, she emerged from her wrappings before she was fully formed.  Her wings never unraveled.

 If I can manage  to squeeze out a  bit more patience, I best give time some time.  While I venture to say this isn’t always a picnic, it helps to understand the reason for the ants.

As a person who lives for my foodie magazines, it was with great distress that I learned that Gourmet magazine’s parent company, Conde Nast,  was closing the doors on four of its publications – Gourmet, Modern Bride, Elegant Bride and Cookie.  Since I’ve never heard of Cookie, and I don’t plan on marrying again, the one that resonates with me is Gourmet. Such an established, high quality institution – a seventy year old lady.  Apparently for the first 8 months of the year, ad revenues were down by $600 million, forcing swift and tough action as recommended by McKinsey & Co.

Given Conde Nast also owns Bon Appetit - a magazine with slightly higher circulation and ad revenue – it was logically decided that both magazines did not need to coexist.  It’s unfortunate, with the proliferation of food magazines in the market, many of which are of lesser quality than Gourmet, that both of these amazing magazines had to have the same parent.  While I’ve promised myself never to use this analogy, it’s Conde Nast’s Sophie’s Choice.  (I’m very sensitive to the seriousness of the implication of Sophie’s Choice, and have been in far too many business meetings where this term is used to describe insignificant business choices – and I’m always irritated by the misuse of that term – anyways fodder for another blog!)

The silver lining?  Apparently Conde Nast is committed to book publishing, TV shows, and online recipe publishing via epicurious – but as one reader said – “my iphone epicurious app certainly does not replace holding and viewing a magazine of wonderful recipes, articles and beautiful photographs.”  I wholeheartedly agree.

Well, I’m not exactly timely with this post, but given the trifecta of brazen behavior we all witnessed over the past week, and how this behavior continues to occupy my daily thinking, I decided to get some thoughts down. Each act, in and of itself, was almost unbelievable.  Representative Joe Wilson …. Serena Williams …. Kanye West … elected government official and leader … star athlete and role model … accomplished musician.  All role models for today’s youth.  Have these people become so powerful in their own minds, that they have the right to say ANYTHING, anywhere, anytime?  Well, obviously, each one of them thinks so.  Talk about moral bankruptcy.

I keep pondering … what must Joe Wilson’s children think?  To have a father who shows such a gross disrespect, judgement and lack of decorum to the President of the United States?  I could more easily let go of this if I truly thought that Wilson had any true regret over how he behaved.  His half hearted apology was quickly followed by his touting the double standard, citing certain members of Congress booing Bush during a speech.  Now I agree, that’s not right either – but I also don’t understand how that offers any excuse for his own behavior.  And these politician’s are great at turning any tumble into an opportunity.  His outburst is fueling his campaign strategy now to raise money for  his re-election.  From his website:

Instead of working on the important issues facing our nation, the Democratic leadership has proven once again that they would rather play political games on the taxpayer’s dime than work to create jobs or reform health care.

The liberal supporters of a government takeover of health care are using my very vocal opposition as an excuse to muzzle the American people who have been outspoken against their risky plan. But I will not give up and I will not back down from our fight. I will continue to speak the truth.

Will you please make a donation to help me fight back against these partisan attacks?

Thank you for standing with me in this fight,

Joe Wilson
U.S. Representative

I cringe when the true elements of a person’s characters are exposed – and they just happen to be in a position of power with the ability to make decisions that impact a large number of us.  The only good news here is that a fellow South Carolinian, who plans to run against Joe Wilson next year, has raised over $800,000 since Wilson’s outburst last week.

Now Serena.  It was an intense moment, and in an intense moment, sometimes our raw emotions are exposed.  I can understand how frustrated she must have been over what seemed to be a bad call.  But threatening bodily harm with a few choice explicatives thrown in is the farthest thing from sportsmanship that exists.  Her actions left a pall over the semi-finals event – which not only forced her to lose the game, but left her worthy opponent, Kim Clijsters, robbed of a legitimate victory.  Thank goodness Kim ultimately won the title. She deserved it.

Last – Kanye West.  For some reason, his brazen act bothered me the most.  I was stunned that someone would have the audacity to run up on stage and take away such a special moment from Taylor Swift.  What was he thinking?  How would anyone in the right frame of mind, even contemplate doing such a thing?Obviously he is a troubled person, and as he has attested to, needs to do some soul searching.  The silver lining in this story was Taylor herself, who handled the situation, and the post interviews with remarkable grace.

When three things like this hit so close to each other, it makes me worry about the state of our nation.  It is clear in each of these three instances that this trio, who have each achieved fame and stature, think they also have permission to do whatever they want to do, regardless of how it impacts others.

All right, it’s off my chest.  Not a light Friday, but I feel better.