Have you ever coveted a shiny, new toy or gadget, like a Blackberry or IPhone? Only to receive it as a gift, and quickly realize that, while the perfect gift brings delight, it also requires planning and effort (i.e., work!) to truly enjoy it.

I went through a similar process when I received the one thing I truly crave: the gift of time. To be specific, 48 glorious hours, no family around, and no commitments on the calendar. I was practically drooling when I found out that I had a completely free weekend (and so was every other female I told.)

When I first learned I would be alone, I jotted down ideas of things I wanted to make sure happened during the as yet unspoken-for weekend. Knowing the importance of putting “first things first,” I planned to build the weekend around these high priority want-to’s. The final list included four items:

1. 1.5-hour massage
2. overdue movie outing with a friend to see “Julie & Julia”
3. facial and eyebrow waxing appointment (also overdue)
4. sushi dinner

After scheduling these commitments, I decided I would leave the rest of the weekend free and simply do (or not do) as the spirit moved me.

The 48-hour countdown gift began on Friday night at 5 pm. Unfortunately, I was so drained by a busy week at work, all I could dream about was collapsing in my bed. But, I didn’t want to “waste” an entire evening of freedom. So, I compromised with myself. I drove to Border’s, picked up a book on how to maximize personal energy (which seemed particularly important given I’m at the beginning of the semester, and I already feel exhausted), stopped by Chipoltle for dinner to go, and headed home. By 7:45, I was in pj’s and in my bed thumbing through my new book. Ahhh … heaven.

The “work” phase began Saturday morning when I woke up and had six hours of unclaimed time stretching before me and my facial. Now what? I was paralyzed by all the possibilities. I had to sit down and sift through my impulses and decide whether to place them in the yes pile or no pile. I found myself resorting the piles several times over the course of the weekend. And, I hate to admit this, but this process felt like WORK! (I know, you now see me as one of those vile creatures who complains she can’t gain weight or doesn’t know how to spend her money. Sorry. But, it’s true – it’s not as easy as it sounds.)

On Saturday afternoon, my friend Gail asked me what I had planned for Sunday morning. At the time, I was in “doing” mode and I rattled off the plan: mass at 7:30 (remember, I LIKE getting up early), trip to Wegman’s to fill our empty fridge, and then trip to Costco. My goal was to hit the stores while most were reading the Sunday newspaper, avoid the dreaded crowds, and feel good about lounging around the rest of the day after my productive morning.

With a few verbal slaps (admittedly well-deserved), Gail “encouraged” me to rethink this plan. Changing gears and expectations was a tad difficult for me, but I managed. On Sunday, I ended up not leaving my house until my 4 p.m. massage and spent the time cocooning in my house. Thank goodness for Wise Women friends like Gail!

So, what can I conclude after a weekend focused solely on “want to” versus “have to”? I realize that the ‘have to’ pull is quite strong even in the absence of others and their requests. That there can be overlap between the ‘want to’ and ‘have to’ lists if I have the right attitude. (For example, I did a lot of cleaning this weekend, and truly enjoyed every minute.) That being completely choiceful actually takes effort or “work.”

But, wow! That kind of work is worth it!